Healthy Families

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KEY POINTS

• Healthy families communicate clearly, support each other, spend time together, and make the family a priority.
• If your family has problems in these areas, ask your healthcare provider, religious leader, or a family therapist for help.

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What is a healthy family?

In the past, a family has been thought of as 2 parents raising children. Today's families come in all shapes and sizes. Healthy families:

• Communicate clearly with each other
• Spend time together and do things together, including chores and fun activities
• Support each other and show that they care about each other
• Make the family a priority

At least one adult in the family needs to:

• Set rules and limits for children to teach them right from wrong, how to share, to stand up for their own rights, and how to love another person
• Show love and support for your children
• Support the family financially
• Be a good example for the children
• Take care of your children’s mental and physical health

What are the keys to creating a healthy family?

The keys to creating a healthy family are communication and support.

Communication includes:

• Talking regularly to other family members
• Using praise and positive talk to shape behavior
• Talking about issues and resolving differences of opinion
• Taking time to sit down as a family and talk about the events of the day or week

Mealtime is a great time for your family to talk about interests, concerns, and worries. Encourage your children to talk and to listen to others as they share stories and experiences. This helps keep your family feeling close and connected. Children who have meals with their families are less likely to smoke, drink, and abuse drugs, and more likely to do well in school. You may want to set up a regular "family meeting" time. It is a good idea to turn off the TV and cell phones so that no one is distracted. Role model good communication for your children. Listen to others, make eye contact, ask questions, and make sure you have understood what others are saying.

Support includes:

• Telling your children, “I love you” and letting them know that you value and appreciate them, even when things are not going well.
• Saying thank you and praising efforts – not just results.
• Being involved in your child’s world each day. This means that you build a strong and natural bond by showing an interest in friends, school work and activities.
• Showing that you trust each other to make good decisions.
• Approaching problems with an open mind, with the goal of helping one another.
• Being able to change if needed, without getting upset. This includes being able to say, “I’m sorry” when you’re wrong, and teaching your children how to apologize.
• Letting children help with household chores. Small children can help set the table, clear dishes, take the trash out, and feed animals. Older children can help with housework, take care of the garden, and wash their own clothes. Chores can help children feel like they’re doing their share in taking care of the family. A sense of accomplishment from doing chores can also help build self-esteem.
• Having fun together and building positive memories. This could mean playing a game, watching a video, going to the park or attending sports events, school plays, or award dinners together.

What are signs that my family may need help?

Here are some signs that your family may need help:

• Behaving in ways that cause problems for other family members, such as abusing alcohol or drugs
• Not talking to each other or avoiding each other
• Constantly blaming or insulting each other and not treating other people with respect

Ask your healthcare provider, religious leader, or a family therapist for help.